Home Sweet Home

How I want home to be totally different from school for my boys

I’m going to come right out and say it…I am most definitely not a tiger mom. If I had to compare myself to an animal mom, it would have to be something nurturing like a kangaroo mom, keeping her young nice and warm in her pouch. Or a bird mom, feathering and fluffing up her cosy nest, feeding her little chicks with tasty worms…or mind you, have you ever seen a swan mom when someone gets too close to her cygnets? She is way scarier than a big cat in the jungle! But my point is this: I am a homely kind of mom. After a long, tiring day at school, I want my kids to come back to the nest to relax, to be warm, safe, and to be fed. I want them to be able to switch off from the pressure of the school environment, and all the expectations and discipline there, and to take refuge and comfort in the more relaxed and loving atmosphere of home. 

Although my boys go to an international school which places a great emphasis on creativity and freedom, there is still structure, routine, expectations and rules around behavior. At home, I believe we should be more adaptable. Home is a place of emotional security, a place for my sons to unwind and to recharge their social batteries. The expectations are less, and the freedom for them to be themselves in their own, safe surroundings, is just so important. Although I support home reading, and of course I help them with their homework, I don’t put rigid rules on them. That’s not to say I don’t instil in them a sense to carry out duties around the home – that’s all part of being on a family team, of course. I want them to have a routine of sorts at home, for them to know that if I set them a task then I want it to be completed before they can move on to leisure time. I think that kind of mindset, if learned in childhood, will become habit by adulthood, and will serve them well in the wide world when the no longer live with their mom!

 Also, for me, what a child learns at home is so much more important than what they learn in school! Sure, school is incredibly important academically and socially. At school my boys learn how to interact with their peers, how to work as part of a team, how to make friends. But the bonds created at home, between family members, where they learn to love and be loved in return, are truly precious and unparalleled. What is more important – learning social niceties at school, or learning what it is to truly be yourself at home, the freedom of that, the importance of family ties? My brother, in many ways, is my own best friend! Childhood only comes round once…. and home is such a wonderful place to explore the best parts of life. A place to take your socks and shoes off, dress how you want, and to relax! Home (and not school!) is where the heart is…